So, I decided to take a break over Christmas and start writing again in January. But then February sounded better… then March came around… and here we are in April and I seem to have finally broken my spell!
What the hell have I been up to, you ask? SFA, to be honest. I had an awesome Christmas with family then took a month to recover, not even kidding! Treatment-wise I had given up on my Fibro for a minute and tried to focus on my mental health. I have been on a new medication the last 3 months, and it’s been awful! It brought out the worst in all my symptoms both physically and mentally. I got a rash under my eyes when I started, and guess what? The fucker is still there. So I’ve given the meds the 12 weeks I needed to before deciding if it wasn’t going to work and yeah, not working. I have now spoken with my doctor and am currently weaning off it, slooooowly, because apparently another awesome side effect is that you can develop a life threatening rash… thanks Doc for that info before I began!
My job… ugh, my job. I sadly had to give it up because it became very toxic and abusive, and in the end my body and mind could not keep pushing through. My anxiety became so bad, I would cry my eyes out before a shift and usually end up cancelling. Didn’t help that my supervisor and biggest supporter at work stepped down, so I had a new supervisor I did not know and did not feel comfortable telling all my personal shit too; so it was easier for all if I moved on. I had been there for four years so a burn out was well overdue, considering I had been there longer than anyone else because of massive and constant staff turnover. Now, what to do next? I need a break from youth work but I have no experience in anything else. I wanted to apply at a craft store but my retail experience is next to zero. Like… I can deal with a substance affected young person, call paramedics and police for suicidal or physically abusive youths, but I can’t handle a “do you sell this” or an angry Karen demanding to talk to the manager? I literally don’t know what I could do next 😦
But anyway, while I have been on break from writing I discovered another new hobby (yeah, they change monthly): making Vinyl Decals and cute shit out of card and vinyl. It’s actually super fun because it lets my creative side out, takes hours so keeps my mind distracted and I have even been able to sell some things I have made, win win! Do any of you have a good little home business? I would love to hear about it, maybe I could do a blog post featuring some awesome home businesses run by Fibro Warriors? Could be a cool idea if I get enough interest! Speaking of, before I went on strike/sabbatical I asked a friend to write about the benefits of essential oils for Fibro. Well, she put in time and effort and sent me something AMAZING to post, but I suck and never got around to doing that blog… however this WILL be featured in the next blog, like next week or this week maybe. I want to commit again to posting twice a week but I honestly can’t promise anything; as you all know too well life can change at any moment, but I will do my best because I do enjoy talking to you guys!
“Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another, ‘What! You too? I thought I was the only one.”C.S. Lewis
Before I go, can I have a vent? Well, I guess no one is here to tell me to shut the fuck up, so here I go: I asked this new doctor I have been seeing if I could get a referral to a physio because my pain sucks and my last physio sucked. He told me that he needed the name of the rheumatologist who diagnosed me… because “no one gives that diagnosis anymore”. Dude, what the fuck?! I am in pain, I don’t give a fuck what name you want to give it, just give me a referral already!!! So yeah, that will be my week: getting blood tests, convincing my doctor to help me with my pain even though he thinks it is some kind of imaginary fairyland disease, and spending not nearly enough time making pretty stuff.
Until next time, Peace Out!